Working with the Mind-Body Connection
Recently, working has been tough on me. Somewhere, somehow, I've caught some kind of annoying bug. I don't have many symptoms at all, only a foggy mind and a body that feels like it weighs about 10,000 pounds. All I want to do is sleep and, when I wake up, I look for the next opportunity to do it again. The lack of other symptoms just adds to the aggravation I feel — I don't look sick. I have no good, visible excuses for not showing up at my work. Of course the problem remains that when I show up at my computer, all I want to do is sleep.
I know that you're familiar with the old saying, 'Mind over matter.' Doesn't it sometimes really surprise you how some little trouble on our physical side can practically incapacitate us mentally? It surprises me! One day I can be charging along at full steam, handling every issue that comes up with finesse and creativity, and the next day, I can be staring at a printed page wondering what all those words mean. We humans are a lot more than just a 'ghost in a machine' — that 'machine' has a great deal of influence over the 'ghost' if you ask me.
When you're dealing with others (or yourself) as you run our business, can you maintain a high level of sensitivity toward what may be going on inside the other (or even yourself)? Some people have become adept at tuning out the body's messages (and even feelings) just to focus on whatever subject is directly at hand. These people have trained themselves to ignore what's going on inside at their own peril: they often don't notice when their repressed feelings are oozing out in unconscious ways. They also don't notice the visual and audible cues that their audience gives them about their own discomfort.
What's the result of this deliberate lack of awareness? It always results in a breakdown of communication. The message doesn't come across clearly, and it doesn't get received appropriately. You can expect a chasm to open up between the 'saying' and the 'hearing', between the 'sending' and the 'receiving'. For communication to work, you have to have the kinds of awareness in operation that allow you to send a clear and unambiguous message to someone who's ready and willing to listen. This can't happen if you lack empathy and ignore the state of the bodies involved in this process.
Only a small percentage of what people communicate is passed through the words. It takes a great deal of sensitivity to be a good listener, and being a good listener is essential for being a successful entrepreneur, professional, or career woman or man. How well do you consciously pick up on the cues that your own body is sending you? And, how well do you consciously pick up on the cues that your listeners are sending? Becoming more aware of how you feel and of how your listeners feel provides a necessary first step for improving your skills as a communicator — and as an engaged listener.
H. Les Brown, MA, CFCC
Copyright © 2008 H. Les Brown
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